Forever can never be long enough

School is so stressful really. It's workload over workload over workload, we barely get to sleep. I kinda think I nap more than I actually get proper sleep. Eye bag's probably worse than a panda's already!

Something's been bothering me so much lately. I miss mama and papa and I barely have time to visit them though I really want to. Then again, when I see them how am I going to break the news about Tod to them? Seriously breaks my heart to just think about it. Each time I think of this entire cycle, it freaking makes my eye all teary, my heart all heavy. Life's unfair, sometimes I do wish I'm God.

I think I've lost faith. In God. I mean, there's something in me that's holding me back from giving up on my faith, which is a good thing I guess. But I just can't seem to "force" myself to church. Everything's pretty much been going downhill, then uphill, like a roller coaster. Seriously, don't underestimate it when people tell you it's tough being a teenager. At this stage, some how everything just becomes your fault and your problem. We're somehow at this stage whereby we're not "old or mature" enough to be adults, yet "too old and mature" to be classified as kids. So when you put it all together, it's just that we're at the age where people don't take you seriously. It's just so annoying.

All these stress piling up, I gotta pull myself together man.